X-Men: Battle of the Atom by Brian Michael Bendis

I recall reading this entire collection during one supposedly uneventful night, and it featured the big-event crossover orgy that span across four ongoing X-titles. I was but blissfully unaware of the troubling clusterfuckeries ahead while I contentedly sipped my hot ginger tea as I read. I happened to only peruse through the first two issues in the first hour or so, taking my time, which was still a long way to go before I was struck by the epiphany that this was going to get even crazier than I could ever imagine an X-title could go. 

That's how little I knew that I was in for a catastrophic experience where everything I know about X-Men will be questioned--and this is coming from somebody who experienced Fabian Nicieza's most insane pieces and Claremont's most sadistic emotionally draining ones. Please take note that I am writing this review after distancing myself from this story for three weeks. I initially always review an issue as soon as I'm done reading it so I can get right into it, especially if either the issue in particular is (a) awesome as fuck; or (b) boring as shit.

The latter part of Brian Michael Bendis' roster for All-New X-Men (from issue #26 to #39) had fallen in the b-category so I was more than eager to put that series behind me for good once September wraps up, and I intend to finish it with my overdue review of Battle of the Atom which for me will forever be known as the Last Great X-Men Story from Bendis' ANXM. 

This tantalizing ten-issued arc will be followed later on by entertaining issues (#18-21) concerning the Purifiers before it will get eventually pointless by the time The Trial of Jean Grey hits (#22-24), saved only by the nice break with the 50th anniversary issue of X-Men Gold where I Cherik-ed and issue #25, before completely falling in its ass with the most regrettable issues ever conceived (#26-29) about a rehash of the villains from Battle of the Atom, and the passable storyline about the Ultimate universe in issues #30-36. Because second time is the worse nightmare and to demonstrate that he learned nothing after The Trial fiasco, Bendis writes another Guardians of the Galaxy crossover with The Black Vortex (#38-39) which I didn't even bother talking about because it was incomplete. My mindset while writing this review was one of mental anguish and exhaustion borne out of the consistent tedious blandness of the stories that followed since Bendis produced the masterstroke that was Battle of the Atom. 

Well, maybe deeming it as a 'masterstroke' is an unfair hyperbole; clearly, BotA is not a perfect piece. It was beguiling though--fast-paced, quirky and shocking during its ten issue-spread of intersecting narratives. I was speechless about it for a time because I don't know how I felt about it as a whole which was why I delayed coming up with a cohesive review that outlines my complete thoughts about its content. There are parts I immensely enjoyed and parts that baffled me to no end, which was why I was rendered in a fit of hysterics that were only succinctly captured by the following GIFs belows as I updated my reading progress in Goodreads. Comprised of the titles All-New X-Men, X-Men vol. 4, The Uncanny X-Men, and Wolverine and the X-Men, Battle of the Atom was a batshit crazy and take-no-prisoners crossover event that delivered genuine thrills and shocking twists for a lot of the players involved. With an ensemble cast made in both heaven and hell, BotA was stylish, over-the-top, engrossing and unapologetic in its camp and gore moments in between. I loved it because it kept me on the edge of my bed and made me screech and bite into my pillow because of the dizzying cocktail of emotions it brought out, both positive and negative. Much like Nicieza's unforgivably hurtful Fatal Attractions that somehow also combined the kooky premise and storytelling style of Claremont in X-Men Forever, Battle of the Atom was a brave endeavor, daring into places that you thought they won't ever cross but they did and it got super weird and totes uncomfortable midway, but it remained just as addictive to the very end.

Allow me to take you to my journey of psychosis as I read Battle of the Atom. This is all subjective and you may not share my unraveling and descent to madness in the same level of intensity as I did but that's probably because you didn't have the same emotional stakes or baggage as I did when I went into this story. It's hard to believe it was only the beginning of September when I was still able to feel something for Bendis' All-New X-Men--when I was still capable of love and remorse, of loss and triumph. Food still has flavors; the world looks like a promising and pleasurable place to mingle and explore. Now I'm relieved to end my reviews for ANXM because it has gotten so disappointing and shitty that I'm excited to start with a new series, this time going a few years back with Joss Whedon's The Astonishing X-Men.

FIRST STAGE: Four issues in

The time-dispelled Original Core Five (OCF) try to make the best of an uncomfortable situation as they are propelled into a timeline where nobody wants them around, including the current X-Men themselves. Young Scott discovered that his future self becomes a mutant terrorist, Jean found out about the many ways she dies in the future and is currently adjusting to her newfound telepathy while Warren (Angel) leaves to join the cool clique (present-day Cyclops and his Dream Team). Meanwhile, both elder and young Hank are in agreement that they have to see through the gruesome process of culture shock for the sake of science, and Bobby is a walking comedic punchline whose only main contribution is when he came out of the closet by issue #40. In Battle of the Atom, a group who claims to be the future X-Men came to the current timeline to warn the OCF that they are the product of their choice to stay in a timeline that is not theirs. The shocking revelation comes when one of the members wearing the Xorn helmet is revealed to be the future Jean Grey, all grown-up and facing the consequences of the choice of time-dispelled self who totes ran away with young Scott when she got suspicious of these so-called future X-Men. Everyone scrambled to find the two almost-lovers, but Kitty Pryde was not happy with the way they were hunted down like animals and tried to defend them from everyone who by now are making decisions for the OCF without the teens' consent; mostly about them going home. The OCF won't just pack their stuff and leave compliantly, however, which was why a big fight ensues. The fight scenes were the best part of the entire BoTa especially the telepathic battle among Emma Frost and the two Jeans.

SECOND STAGE: Eight issues in

Of course the battle scenes are the selling point of this crossover event. It's Battle of the Atom after all! The epic showdown among the telepaths were greatly handled and as insane and sadomasochistic as we're gonna get. Xorn-Jean of the Future taunts Emma and beats her younger self simultaneously. Young Jean, however, is not going to let her cuckoo adult self get the upper hand so she is just as relenting in her blows. Amidst this intimate battle are the scattered fight scenes among the X-Men and the future X-Men. Magik, however, had seen the future for herself and when she transported back to our timeline, she took young Bobby and Warren to show them what happened to the future where they discovered that the REAL X-Men are composed of old mama Jubilee and son, bearded Colossus, Storm's daughter...and basically not the ones who arrived earlier in the current timeline, forcing the OCF to get back home. Magik transports these real X-Men who revealed that the impostors are no other than the FUTURE BROTHERHOOD OF EVIL MUTANTS. At this point, Xorn-Jean and the Impostors are in the process of trying to send back the OCF, only to utterly fail. The woman posing as the old Kitty Pryde turned out to be Mystique's bastard son with Wolverine named Raze. Deadpool is a Brotherhood recruit and betrays people, which surprises no one. Xavier also had a doppleganger son who is the bastard child he had with fucking Mystique. Yeah, Raven sure got busy and produced villainous offspring from two upstanding men. There's a twist that really pinches you in the balls. Also, it was later revealed that the future that was created because of the OCF being there meant humans are more hellbent in destroying mutantkind...or something to that effect. Honestly, I am baffled with a lot of the supposedly logical explanations for some of the issues. All I trusted on was my interest and excitement in how this story is going to end, especially regarding the intense confrontation between the two Jeans. If people suddenly asked me what is going on that got me so riled up and rattled while reading this story, I'll just start weeping in a corner because all that has happened was full-on sensory overload!

THIRD AND FINAL STAGE: Finished

Whatever I just managed to go through and accomplish reading was too much for me that I could simply hyperventilate just thinking about it. Like a trauma victim, I refused to talk about it online. I just turned off my laptop and crawled back into bed. With my eyes closed, I had vague images in my head about the events that I witnessed in the story I just read--and I had to curl up into a ball and chant repeatedly to myself "just go to sleep, go to sleep..." The next day, feeling refreshed, I still wasn't feeling that eloquent enough to type out my thoughts. So I delayed posting a sensible review. And even when I finally opened up about this, what you got here is nothing more than a series of ramblings written by a lunatic who still can't figure out how she really feels about everything she read in Battle of the Atom. 

I don't even know how to end this review properly. So I'm just going to end things abruptly and recommend you to read BotA yourself, imparting nothing more than an evasive dark promise of what you can expect when you pick it up. I'm probably exaggerating its aftershocks. It's probably just my frail, feminine constitution. In any case, don't believe everything I stated here. I'm possibly still recovering and probably doing a bad job with that too.

RECOMMENDED: 8/10

All-New X-Men by Brian Michael Bendis #17 [Battle of the Atom]

It's going to be so weird trying to talk about this. After all, I don't plan on posting individual reviews (yet) for the other parts of this arc that belong to other titles. Strictly speaking, the issues from Bendis' All-New X-Men that were a part of Battle of the Atom were issues 16 and 17 only, and this issue is already the sixth part of the storyline, chronologically speaking. That means if you're only reading this review without knowing anything else from the other titles, this is going to be jarring, very spoilery and confusing as fuck. 

Originally, I wasn't planning on reading Battle of the Atom as a separate arc itself for this month, but since the events that occurred there have aftermath effects in the next issues of ANXM, I felt the need to finish it the entire thing and discuss only what was in the pipeline for ANXM. I understand now that it's been a horrible mistake. But I'm such a fucking completist that I will be remiss if I don't include the review for issue #17 right now. So I guess I'll just post this anyway and just warn you that this is very SPOILERY and if you haven't read Battle of the Atom for yourself, just go ahead and skip this. I'm personally just writing this to appease myself.

I will try my best to recap some stuff here that were covered in the previous three issues as succinctly as I could. It's wonky already so I really suggest for you stop reading this review now and go straight to #18.

So after Jean and Scott ran away when shady characters time-traveled and claimed to be the future X-Men, everyone is a part of the search party especially after said future X-Men revealed that the OCF (Original Core Five) have to be sent back to their own timeline because the time-space continuum has already suffered enough, and these future X-Men said that their future is in chaos, and it's all because the OCF stayed behind in this current timeline. Determined to fix that and aided by the rest of the present-day X-Men like Wolverine, Kitty and Storm, they tried to convince Scott and Jean to go back. But Scott and Jean sought the protection of none other than the present-day Cyclops and his revolutionist Dream Team who argued that the OCF should have a choice about whether to stay or not. Only Emma disagrees and even led the future X-Men to their location so they can detain the OCF. 

Some fight scenes happen, the most memorable of which were Emma and the future Jean Grey's telepathic attacks on one another as the young Jean tried to contribute something to the battle. That confrontation was definitely my most favorite scene so far. I knew we're going to get some Emma vs. Jean moment in this series and it blew all my expectations in the water! Also, it proves yet again that Jean Grey for this new continuity is absolutely INSANE more so in the future. I freaking cannot handle this woman right now, Jesus fuck!

As it turned out, the future Jean Grey who time-traveled is not the Jean Grey we all knew from the old continuity. This is the Jean Grey time-dispeled young Jean became after making the stubborn decision not to go back to her own timeline. Now her all grown-up self came back to literally and telepathically beat some sense into her. That in itself is suspicious so Magik *(taking young Bobby and Hank with her) transported herself to the future and this is when they found out that the shady people who claimed to be the X-Men were not the real ones but impostors; otherwise known as the Brotherhood of Mutants in the future, led by Charles Xavier's grandson and alongside the weathered Jean Grey (masquerading as Xorn, of all disguises), senior Kitty Pryde, the horns-sporting Beast and freaking Deadpool.

Now, as it turns out, the real X-Men of the future were the matured Jubilee, mustached Colossus (I could never get over that 'stache!), equally surprising Merlin-looking Iceman (how many versions of Icemen are we going to see?), and Sentinel X (whom Bobby hilariously referred to as "not-Iron Man"). There was also a young woman who suspiciously resembled Storm herself (who will be casually revealed on a later issue as her daughter named Kymera). See for yourselves the "real" X-Men of the future:

So that was essentially what happened for this issue. It's only going to get crazier.

RECOMMENDED: 8/10

All-New X-Men by Brian Michael Bendis #16 [Battle of the Atom]

This would be the second installment of the Battle of the Atom crossover storyline and man, it certainly delivered from the promise of the opening issue! I was all shades of excited after reading this piece. It had the most suspenseful build-up and pacing that is sometimes hard to capture in a second part of a multiple-chaptered arc but this one from the sixteenth issue of All-New X-Men did just that. It captivated me so well. In addition, there were at least six or seven full spreads in this comic book AND THEY WERE RENDERED RATHER SPECTACULARLY! It'a a visual orgasm for me.

It has to be said that, for now, I'm only going to read and review the installments of this crossover arc that exclusively belong to All-New X-Men which I know might get confusing since the next issue which is #17 is officially the EIGHTH installment of Battle of the Atom so once I read that after this, I would have missed out so many other things in the other issues before it. 

Don't fret for me. I'm a big girl and I can handle a little jarring chronology in my comics readings. Sure, I got so pissed when I read Age of Apocalypse in the wrong fucking order four months ago, but that was the fault of the Omnibus' publication not mine. This time I am choosing to read certain portions of Battle of the Atom that is relevant to my strict monthly schedule right now. You're free to skip my review for ANXM #17 if you don't want to get things mixed up and spoiled ahead for you. So, let's talk about the second part of the critically-acclaimed ten-chaptered story for Marvel Now! X-Men that is Battle of the Atom.

The issue opens with Cyclops and his Dream Team in their bunker--I mean, 'school', viewing footage of their fight with the Sentinels from last issue because Dr. Magneto--sorry, just Magneto--explained that they need to learn how to fight better so he's going all high school-coach on them as they are apparently his personal varsity mutant team (Cyke is totes principal/dean/headmaster material anyway). Christopher the healer is so freaked out by his newfound ability to raise someone from the dead in the previous issue that he had to get some air. Cyke followed him and reassured him that the young Scott wasn't really dead when Chris healed him, that he was probably comatosed. Annoyed by the casualness of his explanation, Chris stressed that perhaps Cyke is just so used to crazy things happening all the time that nothing fazes him anymore. Cyke didn't even bother disagreeing. And so we segue to where we left off from the cliffhanger last issue where we meet characters claiming to be from the future X-Men when the time-displaced OCF decided to stay in the present timeline. They are basically the living testament that the OCF trying to change their futures only made the future even bleaker and so these future X-Men are here to make sure the teenagers go back to their actual timeline.

Somewhere in Cyke's bunker-school, Warren is probably flapping his wings in celebration (if he only knew).

Wolverine stepped in to get to know these strange people. One by one they revealed themselves. First, there was a really adult Kitty (maybe mid-forties) who jumped into Logan's arms. Next, a Beast who is rocking some horns on his head which teenage Hank and present Beast are truly fascinated by since that meant they had another physical-altering mutation stage. We also had Deadpool who pushes old Kitty away so he can mockingly smooch Logan in the face. The most notable appearance had to be the bald guy who claimed to be Charles Xavier's grandson. No, wait. The most notable appearance, as far as teenage Bobby is concerned, is his futuristic version whom he is not a fan of:

I get to have my own small meltdowns every now and then too, you know! ~Bobby

While in the middle of this odd meet-and-greet, Wolverine began attacking their visitors which was rude, of course, but during the commotion between both sides who started attacking back one another (why not), Wolverine claimed it was not him who started it; that someone was controlling his arms. They looked around frantically and realized that both young Jean Grey and Scott Summers were gone. We get a flashback sequence two minutes ago where Jean telepathically communicated with young Hank that something was wrong about their visitors, that she can't read their minds, and she is instinctively distrustful of that. She can't explain it but she feels in her gut that the visitors are not who they are claiming to be. She begged Hank to get out of there with her but--not to my surprise--Hank opted to stay. As a man of science, he is more interested to see how things unfold because his inherent curiosity will always be something he listens to--more than the girl he is in love with. And that, ladies and gents, is the reason I personally believe why Hank will never be with Jean Grey. He is far too cautious and absorbed in his scientific pursuits to ever notice anything else, including the girl he loves who is adamant in her gut feeling about the wrongness of a situation. In that moment, I think Jean realized that the two of them may have some romantic vibe going on (issue #15) but when and if things go haywire and shitty, Hank will choose to hang back and observe than act first; even when Jean's first instinct is telling otherwise. So what does she do? She turned to Scott instead but I don't think she was really expecting a different result.

And yet, in less than ten seconds after she connected with his mind and told him in one sentence that she doesn't have a good feeling about this, Scott (who is just as cautious and practical as Hank, probably even more so) looked at her and agreed and then she started controlling Wolverine's arms to distract everyone as she took Scott's hand and they ran away together. OH, IT WAS VERY ROMANTIC AND ADORBS! I am never sarcastic when it comes to Jean and Scott's undeniable and visceral chemistry and this singular moment only solidifies the fact that Scott trusts Jean and will trust her no matter what. If she says they're in danger, he will believer her. If she says the end of the world is coming, he will take her hand and follow her to wherever she wants them to go. That right there is why they will inevitably fall in love.

Hank is far too fascinated observing his other selves to pay attention to the gut feeling of the girl he claims to love

Meanwhile, Scott threw away caution in the wind if it meant staying by Jean's side, facing the unknown with her

So after the X-Men figured out what the two lovebirds did, Storm expressed that Jean never would have run away like that if she didn't have a reason to, and Wolverine agreed, stating that she must have picked up something in their visitors' heads that made her bolt and flee. Xavier's grandson admitted that he had cloaked everyone's thoughts so she wouldn't have an access and Wolverine was suspicious now. Just like Jean said, only someone who has something to hide would make such a preemptive decision to block a telepath. 

Rachel Summers also just arrived and focused her attention on the other X-Man who has yet to introduce himself and who was wearing the mask of the person who murdered Jean Grey years ago right there in the school. In response, the person unveiled who he is underneath the mask and it's no other than the adult Jean Grey. Everyone is really shocked especially Rachel, Ororo, Logan and Kitty who never thought they'd see the face of woman they have loved and respected again especially after her brutal murder. Adult Jean had no problem being affectionate to Rachel and Ororo too which showed her familiarity with them which was nice to see. 

So this installment ended with that beguiling revelation. You know what, guys, I think I would probably read and review issue #17 first but will still read the other issues for Battle of the Atom right after doing so. But I won't be posting reviews for those issues and will instead go straight to reviewing only the last chapter of the crossover (since I already read X-Men 01 in the previous post) then continue on with #18 to 40 for the rest of September. Now I might give some bread crumbs about the rest of the storylines that happened in BotA along the way in final review of this crossover, but I'd really rather focus on the issues exclusively from ANXM. Let's see what happens.

RECOMMENDED: 8/10

X-Men: Battle of the Atom by Brian Michael Bendis 01

I've heard some great things about this crossover event named Battle of the Atom. Naturally, I can't wait to see for myself what it was all about and I even managed to avoid any spoiler from last year because I want to be surprised once I read it. At first glance, the premise was pretty intriguing especially when we got to the cliffhanger part at the end. I'm aware that there are other X-titles that I need to read to get a complete picture of the events and I might get around to that once I finished reviewing each Marvel Now! title individually starting with All-New X-Men. There's no rush. After all, I've been enjoying the ride and pacing of this adventure so far. Who wouldn't?

The issue opens with Illyana traveling to the future because she can't help herself--she's deadly curious to see what will happen, if she made the right choice to follow Cyclops and if their revolution did anything to change the course of mutantkind to their benefit. What she witnessed didn't look so optimistic but it can't be said for certain because it was abruptly cut short when the narrative jumped back to the present in the school canteen where the OCF and Kitty received a breaking-news alert from Cerebro.

Apparently, there's a new mutant again and she is completely going buts over exploring her powers which is...er...being able to create prehistoric dinosaurs?? I'm not really sure what I'm seeing but those fuckers look awesome! Who doesn't love dinosaurs? And X-Men has had a complicated and quirky relationship with these creatures going as far as Savage Land era. Anyway, Kitty brings the OCF with her to convince this new mutant to stop being crazy and join their school. Said new mutant is pretty hot, at least Bobby thought so, and called "dibs" on asking her out. So mature as ever, Robert, and he announced this while they are in the middle of fighting the dinosaurs. How quaint. Things were fun for a while and under control until fucking Sentinels just had to crash the party and be the assholes they were programmed to be.

The notable moments in this issue happen when Scott got cornered and almost shot to death by a Sentinel TWICE which prompted Jean to react like a heartbroken girlfriend during both times, after just an issue where she made out with Hank and told him that she is not in love with Scott. At all. SUSPICIOUS SPIDEY SENSES OF MINE ARE TINGLING. Oh, Ms. Grey, your tear-filled eyes and screams of agony betray you. Seriously, you are not fooling anyone, Jeanie, including your lying self. Just look at what a hot mess you are in both instances when you thought you might lose Scott forever:

Jean Grey: Not doing her best to hide her suppressed feelings for a boy she claimed not to love

Jean Grey:  Freaking out again because Scott got hurt, never mind that Hank is seeing her reaction which would've been totes awkward

Another important thing to take note of is the arrival of present-day Cyclops and his Dream Team who proceeded to help Kitty and the OCF in taking care of the trash, ergo, dispose of the goddamn stupid Sentinels WHOM I AM JUST SICK TO DEATH OF LIKE THE DALEKS FROM DOCTOR WHO. It's great to see Warren being amicable and even suggesting to fly Hank so he can kick some Sentinel butt. It's as if there were no hard feelings among them when Warren left which is nice because as much as I like drama in my X-Men soap opera, also seeing young friends acknowledge that the mature thing to do is to put aside their petty differences and fight together is pretty badass and impressive all by itself. Look at these dorks and their adorbs teamwork, where even Magneto (whose shiny new silver attire I forgot to comment on--well, it still looked better than whatever Claremont seventies costume he had on in this issue so it's fine) is a participant.

And then, like I said, Scott got shot by a Sentinel's decapitated head simply because he has the worst luck that day--AND LITERALLY ALMOST DIED. As he was losing consciousness and dying, Emma had that newly recruited mutant Christopher (who is a healer) help the young Scott. Hank noticed that present-day Cyclops was gone all of a sudden as if he just disappeared. But as soon as the young Scott was cured, the older version was back in the realm of existence, leading to the confirmation that if their younger past selves died in this timeline, then they get erased to. WELL, DUH FREAKING DUH. Still, awkward moments ensued, mostly with Jean again, who is by now so obviously clinging onto Scott, A BOY SHE SWORE SHE'S NOT IN LOVE WITH, as if holding him is the most important thing to do and there's nothing else! For fuck's sake, Jean, Hank is watching all of this! BE DISCREET and LESS SHOUTY about it!

Jean Grey: The ultimate denier of romantic feelings, seen here NOT DENYING she would be devastated if Scott died

Scott and Scott: Awkward silence fills the gaps

Back in the school, a discussion happens where democracy basically can suck it!

I really love the fact that there is an ongoing mentor-student close ties between Jean and Kitty, and Scott and Logan (and Wolverine never asked for this and yet here he is, always butting heads with a young "Slim" whom he is obviously learning to care for at this point). Saved by the bell, Logan failed to answer Scott because the time cube started acting out, turning on by itself, and presenting us with these characters who claimed to be from the future IF THE ORIGINAL X-MEN HAD STAYED IN THE PRESENT TIMELINE. 

So, once again yet another TIA moment lands on their feet---this is awkward. 

Like that MTV teen show of the same name, this issue placed everyone in very uncomfortable situations

RECOMMENDED: 8/10